Our Problem for this blog, which is from our Leadership Series on my book 5 AT A TIME, my Leadership guide to planning the 18 Holes of Life, is that 80% of parents don’t have life and career plans for themselves so when children come into the picture it is natural for parents who are not planners to overlook life and career plans for their children during the first four holes of life –age 1 through 20 years.
I published 5 AT A TIME as a self-help guide for individuals to get them to think about planning their life and careers 5-years at a time. Hopefully adult readers will get the message and put 5 AT A TIME planning lessons to work for themselves, regardless of what hole of life they are on when they read the book, but what about the young children? Who is helping them learn about the benefits of a life and career planning process in their early formative years?
A Transition Period: In 5 AT A TIME, we point out you are never to young or old to begin planning life and career 5-years at a time.
That is not quite true on the front end of life. Hole #5 is probably the perfect time—age 21—for young adults to get in the habit of 5-year life and career planning and really start to use some of the fun planning techniques—almost think of it like a video or board game.
I would hope 16 through 20 -year old young adults (Hole #4) would start to have thoughts about their lives and maybe some career options, but it is still early to really do much serious planning on their own. However, if their parents have been thinking about their children’s life during holes 1, 2, and 3—then hole #4 should offer a great transition period to show the children what the parent’s have been planning on their behalf and suggest the child be ready to become the primary life and career planner going forward into Hole #5. If the parents have done little or nothing then hopefully the young adult can see the benefit and pick up the ball on their own.
Parental Planning Holes #1-4
Parents may have helped children start to think about life and career planning through some of the following activities:
1. They have certainly helped with homework projects and maybe explained benefits of different subject matter,
2. The children may have been involved in planning a trip to Disney World,
3. The children may have played sports of some kind and learned about training and conditioning as part of that planning process,
4. Children may have been taught about a family budget and perhaps one for themselves –the process of saving money and spending money within a budget,
5. There could have been a faith element or a club element that outlined growth steps and the preparation required to get to each new step or badge,
6. There may have been discussions are about family generations, who they were, what they accomplished, something about the meaning of life and death,
7. In hole #3 there was discussion of responsibility as a driver with a driver’s license, maybe driving a borrowed car or if you were really lucky your own car,
8. Also, in hole #3 there were discussions starting about further education and training—and all the options available from community college, to university, possible train school options and apprenticeships, working in a family business, or even a military opportunity,
9. That life and career planning discussion, would lead to a discussion about location, living at home versus living on your own or a group setting—and all the financial issues involved in those choices and who would provide the resources,
10. The list could go on and on but certainly your health and any challenges had to be weighed in looking at future options—and maybe it wasn’t just your health but the health and caring required by other family members.
This parental planning through holes of life # 1-4 may have been organized or out of necessity or rather casual and accidental: Whether you and your parents recognized it as planning or just activity management, there was a lot going on in those first 20 years that shaped who you are for the next 70 years (holes of life # 5 through 18). My book 5 AT A TIME suggests you are at the mercy of other for your early years. It’s the time when your brain is forming, you are developing a personality and a value system, and you should be able to process data, but that also takes practice and training.
If your parents didn’t help you in these areas or you were brought up in a negative growth ecosystem, then there is a 50/50 chance you will break to the top tier and see the advantages of planning life and career 5-years at a time. I can only hope if someone exposes you to 5 AT A TIME you can break into the top 50%. If you get that guidance or lucky break you will see the benefits of planning life 5-years at a time and you will be the beneficiary of that planning in your ROL =Return on Life.
Often asked questions:
1. I may have been born lucky into a nice life environment but some might call that a silver spoon and I am just a young adult. Where do I learn these lessons and benefits of planning?
2. On the other side I was born in a broken family with nothing—maybe just a little more than dirt floors. How will life and career planning help me—and where do I find support?
3. I got a sense my parents wanted the best for me but also thought it was going to cost a lot of money. I know I need to help but what can I do to best be successful.
4. Planning is just dreaming—explain why a 5- year plan can make a difference in my life.
Authored by Brad Lienhart, CEO, Lienhart Leadership Consulting, www.bradlienhart.com, lienhartb@yahoo.com. Please contact me for any help on I can provide you or your organization on life and business planning.